Spring is here!

It has FINALLY warmed up now and the snow is melting. I am so happy to see the back end of winter. of course this means the roads are all ice rinks, slush puddles and lakes, but at least it is finally melting.

I'm doing really good with my food and exercise too, had a great week, actually my first in a long time where I actually got all my workouts in and am feeling fantastic for it. A little tired, but I'll take it easy today. I'm sure I'm down another lb or so too, if my jeans are any indication, but I'm not going to weigh just yet.

Ok, this sounds really really vain, but my motivation right now is my really cute jeans that I bought the last time I was at my ideal weight and only wore a few times til I got stuck in the binge cycle yet again and haven't worn them since. That was in June of 2012, so almost 2 yrs and I just think that's sad to have nice jeans like that and not be able to wear them and that 2 yrs is too long! Also my short shorts for summer. I want to look hot. But most of all, when summer comes I want to actually feel happy and excited and free to be myself, and sadly every year it's been far from that. I usually am over my ideal wieght by either a little or a lot, and feel sad when spring comes because I can't wear what I would love to wear. Then I spend the warmest months of the year trying to cover up my fat and feeling miserable both because I can't enjoy summer as much and also feeling crappy physically because of my excess weight. I really think it's time for that to end.
So I have these jeans sitting right where I can see them every day to remind myself of how I want to feel and look, and of how much I want to be healthy.

Going strong

I have picked myself up from my latest dietary fuck-up, and now have a good solid week of eating healthy, juicing and working out under my belt...and have lost 7 lbs. To break that down, here's the math: lost 4 lb in February, had that last slip up during which I ate gluten and salt which caused me to bloat up 4 lb again but lost that during the 4 days after getting back on track. Then lost a further 3 lb this week which puts me at a net loss of 7 lb down since the beginning of Feb. Of course I'd be much further along if I hadn't had the 2 major slips in Feb, but the main thing is I'm back in the game.

One really big thing I realized the other day is that I now accept the fact that I am not perfect and I am going to slip up. But I keep getting back up instead of letting myself feel like a failure and using it as an excuse to let it all go down the tubes again! Lol. I'm starting to see that this is an ongoing thing, not a start, slip and then start over, but rather continue the next day the best I can and keep my goal in sight. Eating disorders and food addictions are not easy to overcome, and there are as many ways to be healthy as there are people in the world, so finding my own individual path is bound to take some time and trial and error.

So if anyone is out there struggling, don't ever give up because it may take 99 tries and fall-downs, and you just have to try again that 100th time because it might be the one that gives you a breakthrough and takes you that one big step further along in the right direction.